she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
