you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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