Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
