Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I've blown a few things in my day
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
