I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS