Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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