i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
