He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
