Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
