so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize