But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
