i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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