so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
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