it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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