Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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