I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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