even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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