i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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