I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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