I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
