we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
