you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
