College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
