Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
this hospital has no fireball
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Randomize
