Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?