Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I must be too annoying 4 u.

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  (810): I must be too annoying 4 u. http://tfl.nu/bqrs
  Replies (7) Good night (911) Bad night (2424)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh

  (1-619): View more from California

  maybe you did when you were drunk

  (619): View more from California

  no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.

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  (619): wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh (1-619): maybe you did when you were drunk (619): no way, i wasn't THAT drunk. http://tfl.nu/a663
  Replies (17) Good night (779) Bad night (2283)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?

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  (253): My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable? http://tfl.nu/rdbs
  Replies (13) Good night (2743) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."

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  (801): We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move." http://tfl.nu/deqa
  Replies (33) Good night (4508) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (409): View more from Texas

  I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop

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  (409): I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop http://tfl.nu/6219
  Replies (16) Good night (936) Bad night (9108)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.

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  (405): I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible. http://tfl.nu/59e7
  Replies (19) Good night (831) Bad night (3669)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'

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  (315): My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?' http://tfl.nu/x9n6
  Replies (13) Good night (8358) Bad night (1369)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...

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  (541): Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds... http://tfl.nu/27nn
  Replies (6) Good night (2028) Bad night (892)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.

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  (541): I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick. http://tfl.nu/18bv
  Replies (11) Good night (1848) Bad night (657)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.

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  (606): I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died. http://tfl.nu/jcdc
  Replies (7) Good night (1464) Bad night (878)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you

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  (212): He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket (617): I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you http://tfl.nu/qdni
  Replies (3) Good night (1682) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"

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  (407): I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry" http://tfl.nu/fy98
  Replies (4) Good night (514) Bad night (1130)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.

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  (765): soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it. http://tfl.nu/zcm9
  Replies (3) Good night (1000) Bad night (367)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.

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  (718): I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best. http://tfl.nu/yss2
  Replies (5) Good night (950) Bad night (355)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.

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  (269): I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest. http://tfl.nu/z8nn
  Replies (2) Good night (535) Bad night (343)

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