Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.