I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
She's just so happy...and so naked.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize