So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Randomize
