i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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