Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
