you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
