Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
