And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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