I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
