So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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