Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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