I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Randomize
