I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize
