some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
