He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
