Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize