Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
