I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
