kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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