..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
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Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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