i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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