So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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