So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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