Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
