I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
