So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
