No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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