Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Randomize
